softer

i went into the coffee shop this week. i was actually going there to try and get away from the office and get some actual work done. i wanted to spend some time in prayer. i wanted to focus on the coming week as it was monday morning. i wanted to be left ALONE. and then i saw him. someone who i used to see often, and haven't seen around for about a year or so. we were never really that close. i tried not to let him get too close. he's a needy person. needy people drain me. i quickly ducked into a side room in the coffee shop and hoped that i hadn't been seen. then this quick pang shot through me and i felt the weight of my actions. this was a person that i refused to walk across the room for...a person i was 'hiding' from. how had my heart gotten to this place?

it's just like God to invade your space. i didn't have to walk across the room as this guy was walking towards where i was sitting. i decided that i'd stop hiding and stop running, even if it's just for today. "i'm going to 'walk across the room' just by extending my hand to this guy", i thought. so i did. we talked for about 20 minutes. i don't know what will become of that encounter, but my heart is a little bit softer. i will pray for him. maybe i'll call. maybe i won't. but i will try to let my heart be softened more and more.

"God, please help me to walk across the room more."